Guys: Do you cry at the thought of frying your own chicken? Do you tremble at the sight of a hot saucepan? Is grilled ham and cheese your only culinary specialty? Well boys, stop your bitchin’ and get into the kitchen cause the Kitchen Bitch is here to make you look like Bobby Flay—a real master of the food arts. The ladies (or gents) will be struggling to keep their tongues off the floor when they smell what’s cookin’ in your kitchen—and you’ll look much sexier in that “Mr. Good-Lookin’ is Cookin” apron you bought so long ago. Hell, the saying on it might actually apply to you for once!
The idea for Man Meals struck when one of my guy friends called and asked if I could help him out with a dinner he planned to make for a lady he wanted to impress. What should he prepare for her? Now, my friend isn’t much of a cook, so he wanted me to make the menu easy but impressive. With all the ingredients I’ve used to jazz it up, it’ll be love at first bite.
Below is just the first of many Man Meals the KB will create for any guy who wants to bowl over his partner with his culinary know-how. We’ll start with a gourmet meat and potato dinner—the sure way to get any man to pick up a chef’s knife and get cooking. Do yourself a favor: don’t walk away from the cooking steaks to answer the door, like my friend did. You’ll burn your steaks!
Man Meal #1: Steak & Potato Dinner
For a printable Word doc of these recipes, click Man Meal Menu #1 here.
Steaks with Compound Butter
You can find a small box of herbs with thyme, sage and rosemary all in one in the produce section. It’s usually called a Classic Herb Mix.
2 sirloin or ribeye steaks, preferably grass-fed
½ stick unsalted butter, room temperature
1 tsp. flat-leaf parsley, chopped
1 tsp. fresh thyme, stems removed
1 tsp. fresh sage, chopped
1 tsp. fresh rosemary, chopped, stems removed
Kosher salt & freshly ground pepper
Mix the room-temp butter, the herbs, and a pinch of salt and pepper in a small bowl, or if you have a food processor, process everything together until combined. Turn out the butter in the middle of square piece of wax paper. Roll the butter up in the paper like a log and freeze for at least 15 minutes. This way, the butter will be in a log shape and easier to cut when you need it.
Liberally season your steaks with salt and pepper. Meanwhile heat a large sauté pan on medium-high heat and then add oil. When oil shimmers, add steaks and cook for about 3 to 4 minutes on each side for medium rare to medium. During the last minute or so, put a pat of the herb butter on top of each steak. Remove steaks from pan and let rest 5 minutes before serving. Put an extra pat of the herb butter on top of the steaks while they rest if you feel like it.
Herbed Red Potatoes
½ tsp. dried basil
½ tsp. dried thyme
1 tsp. dried dill
½ tsp. dried parsley
½ tsp. dried rosemary
½ tsp. garlic powder
3 to 4 red or new potatoes, washed and scrubbed clean of any dirt/debris
½ tsp. kosher salt
¼ tsp. Freshly ground pepper
Preheat over to 400˚F. Dice up red potatoes. Put in a baking dish and drizzle olive oil and sprinkle salt, pepper, garlic and herbs over top. Toss to coat. Bake in oven 40 to 50 minutes, tossing occasionally to make sure potatoes are browned on all sides. Potatoes are ready when they are starting to brown and can be easily pierced with a fork.
Asparagus with Shallots and Gorgonzola
If you can’t find shallots, which look & taste like a cross between garlic & onion, substitute minced garlic or minced onion. Look for shallots near the onions in your grocery store, or in prepackaged bags in the produce section. Gorgonzola is a mild Italian blue cheese made from cow or goat’s milk.
1 shallot, minced
1 bunch of asparagus, trimmed
2 to 3 Tbsp. Gorgonzola, or another crumbly blue cheese
To prep asparagus, hold spear with two hands, bend until the spear breaks. The bottom portion that breaks off is fibrous, pitch it and save the top half for cooking. Do the same for the rest of the asparagus.
Heat a small pat of butter and 1 tsp. of olive oil in a warm pan over medium heat. Add shallot, sauté 1 minute. Add asparagus, season with salt & pepper, and sauté for 4 to 5 minutes until bright green and just tender. Crumble cheese over asparagus and cook for one minute more. Remove from heat and serve.
Ice Cream with Homemade Raspberry Sauce
This recipe was adapted from one by The Tattooed Chef on Allrecipes.com. You can find the original here.
Good quality vanilla ice cream or lemon sorbet
1 pint fresh raspberries (can substitute blackberries for this)
¼ c. sugar
2 Tbs. orange juice (can skip this if you don’t have it)
2 Tbs. cornstarch
1 c. cold water
Combine the raspberries, sugar, and orange juice in a saucepan. Whisk the cornstarch into the cold water until smooth. Add the mixture to the saucepan and bring to a boil.
Simmer for about 5 minutes, stirring constantly, until the desired consistency is reached. The sauce will thicken further as it cools.
If you want, you can puree the mixture in a blender and strain the mixture through a sieve to get rid of the raspberry seeds. Otherwise, just serve over ice cream. Yum! You can serve it hot or cold.